


Autobiography of A Life

by Billxbesitztxmeinxherz



Category: Tokio Hotel
Genre: F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-02-21
Updated: 2012-02-21
Packaged: 2017-10-31 13:40:36
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 11,146
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/344658
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Billxbesitztxmeinxherz/pseuds/Billxbesitztxmeinxherz
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p><i>Man... cannot learn to forget, but hangs on to the past: however far or fast he runs, that chain runs with him.</i>- Friedrich Nietzsche</p><p> </p><p>Tom has been taking pictures of Bill and him for all his life. The past is never really forgotten all it takes is some reminding.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This story has been abandoned.

He stared down at his hands. 

 

Old wrinkled, liver spotted hands that had done so much in their long life. Attached to them was a man just as old and worn down as those hands staring thoughtfully at them. The sun streaked the through the windows as the fan near the blinds blew them back and forth causing the rays to swirl across the room like dancers. Everything was absolutely quiet in this room, like it was supposed to be, and the old man frowned watching as the rays of light twirled across his hands momentarily. In his mind he was trying to grasp them and capture them for his own. He got awfully lonely lately, not that anyone seemed to care, and the old man envied the fact that the small dancers were able to be so free and go where they pleased. Freedom was a word that he no longer knew even though it was inked into his skin forever. In fact these past few years he had been doing a lot of thinking and wasn’t sure that he had ever really knew the true meaning of the word.

 

The room he sat was plain and generic with pale blue walls meant to calm people and plain white blinds that shut out the colorful world outside. It was as if you were in another dimension at Sunnydale Retirement Home for The Elderly and nothing mattered any more. Everything in that place looked the same from the same layout of each room to the same pale green uniform the nurses wore. Everything was the same and no one was special no matter whom you had been previously. Rubber adorned corners of tables and chairs eliminating any possible threats. The beds were low to the ground and had a guardrail next to them, as did the showers in the bathrooms in case one fell. Everything was safety proof creating what appeared to be the most perfect safe place in the world. The old man let out another sigh and brought a wrinkled hand to the blinds timidly touching the starchy rough surface of the fabric. 

 

He remembered what the outside world had felt like, how vibrant it had been. He remembered the sound of trees rustling in the wind on a hot summer’s day, or the sound of waves crashing onto rocks at the ocean. He remembered the sounds of children laughing and dogs barking. He remembered for some strange reason the sight of a tall lanky teenaged boy laughing on a sidewalk, a pile of blonde dreads atop his head. The old man scratched his own head trying to think on why that image had come to mind but was soon interrupted at the sound of a door opening.

 

“Ah Mr. Hartmann,” A pleasant voice cooed, “You’re up.”

 

The old grunted and watched as a young nurse walked into the room carrying a tray of food with her. The smell made his stomach lurch and he frowned as the mush was placed before him.

 

“I’m not eating that,” The man said defiantly crossing his arms over his chest to prove his point.

 

“Now Mr. Hartmann you need to eat doctor’s orders,” The nurse scolded pushing the tray closer to him, “You don’t want to go on the IV again do you? Not after you just earned solid foods again.”

 

“I’m _not_ eating that.” The man said pointedly narrowing his hazel eyes at the nurse.

 

“Fine,” The nurse sighed rubbing her temples, “You have another visitor request for this afternoon what should I tell them?”

 

“Visitors?” The man asked wrinkling his brow, “Why the hell would I want visitors? Send them away.”

 

“I’ve been told it was your wife and children.” The nurse noted smoothing the fabric of her nurse’s uniform down, “Surely you want to see them.”

 

“I don’t want to see them!” The old man snapped banging a withered fist against the plastic table, “Send them away!”

 

The young woman let out a sigh muttering something about old people before picking up the tray again and making her way to the door. Her plain slippers rubbed against the worn down carpet and it sent a light electrical shot up her leg making her jump. Her sudden jerk sent the tray of food tumbling to the floor and down her pant’s legs before landing in a mess at her feet. The old man let out a laugh and clapped his hands together in amusement.

 

“That wasn’t funny,” The nurse snapped glaring one last time at the laughing old man before slamming the thin door shut after her. 

 

“Oh but it was,” The man wheezed still chuckling to himself. His breath caught in his throat for a moment and the man coughed using a fist to pound on his chest until the phlegm went down smoothly.

 

“Erg I hate getting old.” He coughed again waiting for the mucus to leave his lungs. The sudden urge for sleep over took him and he shuffled over to his bed easing himself into it carefully. The mattress was firmer than most but the man had gotten used to it long ago as he laid down and closed his eyes a frown on his face.

* * *

“I’m sorry Mrs. Hartmann but your husband had denied your request to see him,” The woman at the receptionist desk apologized to the short elderly woman standing before her.

 

“Oh,” The woman whispered looking down at her feet in silence, “Did he at least remember that he had a wife a children?”

 

“Yes Mr. Hartmann has been doing very good the past few weeks,” The receptionist informed her, “In fact he’s been doing a lot of thinking lately… about the past.”

 

“And he’s able to remember?” A tall young man about in his thirties asked. He had large hazel eyes that were slightly titled at the corners and light brown hair that had once been blonde at birth. A tall woman that looked identical to him in features stood by the elderly woman between them nodding in encouragement.

 

“Well you’d have to ask the doctor about his condition but from what the nurses have been saying, yes, he has been remembering the past more as of lately.”

 

“That’s good.” Mrs. Hartmann smiled weakly looking at two children in sadness, “Krystal, Wilhelm we should get going.”

 

“Right,” Krystal nodded sweeping some light brown hair out of her face, “Mom are you going to be alright?”

 

“Yes,” The woman smiled sadly as she gripped her son’s strong hand, “Your father just needs some time alone right now that’s all.”

 

“But you’re fine?” Wilhelm asked raising one eyebrow in question. The expression made the old woman’s heart tug and she plastered a fake smile on for her children’s sake.

 

“Of course dear now how about we all go out to lunch huh?”

* * *

“Your family came by today,” A voice said softly breaking Mr. Hartmann from his thoughts, “They were very upset that they couldn’t see you.”

 

The old man sucked in a breath of air before turning to the young nurse an unreadable expression across his face. This had been his meditation time in the retirement home’s garden and he normally liked to spend it alone yet strangely he found himself craving the attention of another person. There had once been a time where attention had given him such an adrenaline rush he would be smiling for days but now…

 

“Mr. Hartmann?” the nurse called breaking him of his thoughts again.

 

“What?” The old man snapped trying to remember what he had been thinking moments before. Something about adrenaline? But why would he be thinking about that?

 

“I said,” The nurse cleared her throat leaning against the trunk of the tree the old man sat under, “Your family misses you the least you can do is see them once in awhile.”

 

“Don’t talk to me.” The old man grunted closing his eyes again and focusing on the cool breeze that blew against his face. He could feel the wind raking through the fine white hair on his head and it sent shivers down his spine. He felt absolutely at peace in the garden a feeling he rarely felt.

 

“Mr. Hartmann,” The nurse interrupted again stepping in front of him and blocking out the sun, “It’s courteous to look at people when they are talking to you.”

 

“And it’s rude for people to interrupt other people’s meditation hours,” Mr. Hartmann snapped cracking one eye open to glare at the nurse, “Don’t young people have any respect for the elderly nowadays? Shove off.”

 

“I was just trying to help.” The nurse fumed looming over him.

 

He closed his eyes again and kept them shut listening intently. He could still tell the nurse was glaring at him from the sounds of her heavy breathing but after a few moments of silence she let out a groan and stalked off crunching gravel beneath her feet. The man let out a content sigh and dipped his head back focusing on how warm the sun felt against his face just then. The trees were rustling around him and he could hear the blades of grass humming as the wind swept over them in great waves. This was all he wanted in retirement no troubles and no worries just aloneness. A shadow soon loomed over the man again and he frowned still not opening his eyes.

 

“Didn’t I tell you to leave an old man in peace?” Mr. Hartmann snapped, “What don’t you kids get about respecting your elders?”

 

“My sentiments exactly,” A voice chuckled.

 

Mr. Hartmann blanched as his eyes flew open at the sound of the unfamiliar voice. He had been sure it was the nurse back to pester him again but instead he was met with the sight of another elderly man smiling above him. The man looked to be about his age and smiled down at Mr. Hartmann with twinkling hazel eyes that made the other old man’s heart do flip flops. Mr. Hartmann frowned and tried to calm himself down unsure on why his heart was beating so fast right then.

 

“Mind if I sit down?” The man smiled motioning to grass.

 

“If it suits you,” Mr. Hartmann replied coolly, “Mind if I catch the name of whom that is accompanying me?”

 

The other old man stopped for a moment as Mr. Hartmann eyed him suspiciously not all too sure of him yet. Finally the other man threw his head back in a laugh and sank into the grass next the latter still chuckling to him self and placing a book next to him.

 

“The name’s Tomas Kaulitz,” The man laughed smiling brilliantly at Mr. Hartmann, as he noted with envy Tomas still had all of his teeth in perfect condition. Mr. Hartmann made sure to not open his mouth too much as he was embarrassed at his veneers he had stupidly gotten as a teen, “And you are?”

 

“Oh,” Mr. Hartmann blinked, “My name’s Wihelm Hartmann.”

 

“Wihelm huh?” Tomas smiled again eyeing the latter, “Gotta a nickname for that? Must be a mouthful if you don’t.”

 

“My wife occasionally calls me Will.” Mr. Hartmann shrugged letting his gaze wander to the tattered book beside Tomas.

 

“Will? I like it.” Tomas smiled. He noticed Will’s gaze was somewhere else and he smiled when he spotted the other man looking at the book beside him, “Something caught your eye?”

 

“Oh well um yes,” Will stammered as he realized he’d been caught, “I was just wondering what’s in that fancy book of yours?”

 

“Just a story nothing special.” Tom shrugged looking off at the coy pond where other residents were hanging out.

 

“Nothing special? That thing must be at least twenty centimeters thick!” 

 

“Well it’s a long story,” Tomas shrugged again still staring off at the pond, “It’ll probably bore you. Besides who wants to sit around and listen to some old yap talk about the past.”

 

“I’ve waited all my goddamn life to retire and I’ll spend my retirement the way I want to thank you very much,” Will protested, “I’d very much like to hear that story of yours Mr. Kaulitz… that is if you still feel like telling it.”

 

“Yeah?” Tomas smiled picking up the book and running a hand down the spine, “You sure?”

 

“Positive.” Will nodded watching as Tomas flipped the book open.

 

“Well it all started long ago in the town of Magdeburg, Germany,” Tomas began his voice coming out smooth like he’d had years of experience telling stories to others, “With these two little boys. Their names were Bill and Tom Trumper.”


	2. Chapter 2

_“Tomi I’m scared.”_

_“Bill get off of my I’ll trip.”_

_“I can’t see anything.”_

_“You’re not supposed to be able to.”_

_“But if I can’t see where I’m going how will I know when to start singing?”_

_“You start singing when I start playing.”_

_“How will you know when to start?”_

_“Bill shh the guys announcing our name.”_

_The younger twin held his breath as the man on the other side of the curtain announced their band’s name; if you could really call it a band, the Black Question Mark. The dingy curtains flew open quickly and Bill gasped softly as the blinding stage lights overtook his vision. The lights were so bright that Bill couldn’t even see out into the small pub and he momentarily froze gripping the microphone tightly in his hand. He could faintly hear the whispers of the man that had announced their name next to him asking if he was okay but all Bill could do was stare out at the lights stupidly._

_“Bill!” He heard Tom hiss off to his right, “Bill! What are you doing?”_

_“I-I…I… um,” Bill stammered feeling his knees knock together, “Um.”_

_“Well alright then,” The host said grabbing the microphone from Bill, “Looks like the kid’s got stage fright folks but give them a hand anyway huh?”_

_The pub remained silent as bar patrons continued to drink their drinks ignoring the frozen doe eyed boy on stage. The lights were still blinding Bill’s vision and he just stared out at it froze with fear as his mind ran a million miles a minute. He and Tom had worked so hard to get that spot at Stadtpfeifer-Kneip-Pub, a small pub outside of Magdeburg. The twins had begged Simone and Jorg for weeks to let them try and perform living out their silly dreams of becoming rock stars and their parents had grudging agreed. Now Bill was messing this up his one chance to prove to his father that maybe Tom and he did have a chance. Bill’s head was swarming with thoughts of what to do and he whimpered quietly only for the sound to be picked up by the mic._

_The sound caught the attention of the other people at the pub and they turned towards the stage staring at Bill who had turned beet red. A short silence followed Bill’s whimper before the entire pub had burst out in laughter hooting for them to just get off the stage and asking if it was past their bedtime._

_Bill still was having difficulty adjusting to the lights but he could barely make out the mortified face of his mother Simone as she glared at the other people in the pub and how Jorg’s face burned bright red of anger and embarrassment._

_“Hey kid it’s alright. Why don’t you guys just come back next week huh?” The man asked covering the microphone so no one could hear their private conversation._

_Bill nodded dumbly before he hung his head and quickly shuffled off the stage. Now hidden safe behind the heavy curtains Bill felt as if he could actually breath and he gasped for air biting his lip to keep himself from crying. He had messed up big time and now Tom and him would never be able to become rock stars. Letting a whimper escape Bill sank to the floor clutching his head as he began to cry the sound drowned out by the laughter still on the other side of the stage. The curtain swung open again and Bill didn’t even bother looking to see who it was as he threw his arms around the person’s waist._

_“Tomi…” Bill sniffed nosing into his brother’s neck inhaling the smell of sweat and Tom’s natural musky smell._

_“Shh Bill,” Tom sighed trying to get his guitar off but Bill was making it difficult by clinging to his shirt like that. Finally he managed to get the strap off and he threw his arms around his trembling brother hugging him fiercely to his equally small body, “Are you alright? What happened out there?”_

_“I-I,” Bill choked between sobs, “I don’t… I don’t!”_

_“Shh,” Tom whispered again rocking his crying brother slowly. They stayed like that for a few moments just breathing in each other’s scent until Bill’s cries turned into small shivers against Tom’s tear soaked t-shirt. Tom felt overly protective of Bill and it hurt him to see his little brother in so much pain and he sighed rubbing his cheek against Bill’s short brown hair._

_“I’m sorry.” Bill whispered against Tom’s neck after a moment._

_“Why?”_

_“B-because…” Bill whispered as his eyes welled with tears again, “I-I just… I just wanted to g-get things right!”_

_Bill broke off with another sob and began to cry again. Instinctively Tom held his brother close again letting him sob until they turned into soft hiccups._

_“Bill you need to calm down,” Tom whispered rubbing his hands soothingly up and down his brother’s back, “I still don’t get it, why are you sorry?”_

_“Because I wanted to get things right,” Bill whispered pulling back and looking Tom in the eyes, “I know how much you wanted to be famous and I r-r-ruined it!”_

_“What?” Tom asked in disbelief, “Bill is that what this is about? Bill, you didn’t ruin anything you got stage fright that’s all. It’s no big deal seriously.”_

_“No!” Bill sobbed curling up into a ball in Tom’s embrace, “Now Dad won’t let us perform anymore! H-he said that we’ll see how things go tonight and they went terrible! He’ll never let us perform again!”  
“Billa shh it’s okay,” Tom murmured into his twin’s hair, “Bill it wasn’t your fault-”_

_“Yes it was!” Bill cut off sobbing again._

_“Bill stop it will you?” Tom sighed, “Billa I could never be mad at you, you know that. How cares if we never become famous as long as you’re my brother nothing else matters. Remember our promise?”_

_“Never tell Mom that we hit Adam at school?”_

_“No that we’ll always be together.”_

_“Oh yeah,” Bill brightened up instantly, “I remember that one! We’re going to be together forever.”_

_“You’re such a butt.” Tom giggled at how Bill was missing his two front teeth._

_“Are not!” Bill whined, “We will be together forever and then someday we’ll get married!”_

_“Ew I’m not marrying you!” Tom said scrunching his nose._

_“Why not?” Bill demanded tugging on Tom’s hair where it was beginning to be twisted into dreads, “I’m nice. I always help you with things, and pick up your toys when you forget, and never tell Mom when you do bad things.”_

_“Bill,” Tom frowned, “I do that stuff not you.”_

_“Oh… yeah,” Bill giggled wiping away the last of his tears, “I think we should still get married.”_

_“Alright fine,” Tom laughed taking his brother’s hand in his own and his guitar in the other as he led them towards the exit, “But you’re going to be the Mommy and I’ll be the Daddy.”_

_“What?” Bill squawked as they pushed the heavy doors to the pub open._

_They stayed like that, walking out hand and hand, even though Daddy always told them not to. They shared a special bond and couldn’t be separated… no matter what. Together forever._

 

“And well that’s the first part of the story.” Tomas cleared his throat shutting the book closed.

 

Will watched sadly as the faces of the two smiling boys disappeared behind the ratty cover of the book and he sighed rubbing his neck awkwardly.   
“Well…” He began meeting Tomas’ gaze, “That was a sweet story, sucks for that Bill character though.”

 

“Does this story sound familiar?” Tomas asked calmly looking off at the pond again.

 

“Well… no,” Will stammered starching his head in thought, “Why? Is it famous or something?”

 

“You could say that.” Tomas whispered still not looking Will in the face. The two sat in silence for a moment when a soft sniff came to Will’s ears.

 

“You alright there?” Will asked concerned as Tomas turned away from him to get up, “I hope I didn’t offend you or something.”

 

“No,” Tomas sniffed wiping his tears away with his sweater, “No you haven’t done anything… it’s just an emotional story for me is all. I’ve gotta go.”

 

“What?” Will asked cringing at the sound of disappointment in his voice, “I mean why so?”

 

“I forgot I’ve got a visitor’s appointment this afternoon I don’t want to be late.” Tomas said softly looking at the grass.

 

“Okay then go ahead I don’t want to keep your folks waiting.” Will said plastering on a fake smile that came all too easily. Tomas momentarily cringed as Will smiled at him and the latter stopped bringing a hand to his lip in confusion.

 

“I’ll see you tomorrow Will,” Tomas smiled sadly turning to leave, “Same time same place?”

 

“S-sure.” Will called after him as the old man made his way back to the building.

 

He didn’t know why but Will had the strangest of feelings that he was missing something important.

* * *

“Nurse I want a laptop for this afternoon’s television hour.” 

 

“A laptop?” The nurse asked stunned turning to look where the old man sat in his chair, “And what could you possibly want with a laptop Mr. Hartmann?”

 

“Personal business is all.” Will sniffed looking out the window.

 

The nurse paused for a moment and stared at him in complete silence. Will could feel his heart pick up a little faster as she just stood there and stared at him but finally after a minute she shook her head and announced she’d be back in a minute.

 

While he sat there waiting Will thought over what he was about to do. Was it strange for him to want and find out more about the story Tomas had told him? Will surely thought not but then again in old age his judgment on these sorts of things had lessened. 

 

“Mr. Hartmann your laptop.” The nurse said soothingly as Will blinked up at her in surprise.

 

“Oh yes,” He grumbled taking it with shaking hands, “Um… thank you.” The nurse stopped smiling for a moment and stared at him in shock.

 

“Why thank you Mr. Hartmann!” After a moment she broke out into a smile and patted him lightly on the arm, “If you need anything just ring me.”

 

Will nodded and waited patiently until the nurse had left before he opened up the device and clicked it on. It had been decades since he had used a computer and his daughter’s attempt of showing him some of the ‘new’ technology just confused him. Besides who in their right minds would have a computer the size of a quarter? Kids these days.

 

“Alright then,” Will whispered clicking on the browser. The blinker stayed put on the search box waiting for him to enter something, “What to type? What to type?”

 

“I know! Let’s try ‘Bill and Tom folk tales’.”

 

The computer hummed as it processed and within a second a whole list of topics had come on, but none of them were what Will was looking for.

 

“Okay then,” He said rolling his neck to get out the kinks, “Let’s try ‘Bill and Tom famous’.”

 

He clicked the search engine again and the computer whirled to life humming softly as it searched. Finally a soft ping announced that it was done and Will leaned closer to the screen reading all of the topic that had come up.

 

“Best and Worst Moments of Bill Gates- Tom’s software,” Will read, “I don’t think so.”

 

“SAG election: Video support by Tom Hanks and Bill Macy, I don’t think so.”

 

“Ah ha! Bill and Tom Kaulitz famous German rock stars-”

 

“Mr. Hartmann?” A voice interrupted.

 

“Ah what?” Will jumped slamming the laptop shut quickly. The nurse raised an eyebrow in question smirking at how frazzled the old man looked. 

 

“Mr. Kaulitz from north dorm room two-o-eight had requested you dine with him in the main hall at seven tonight. Does that work for you?”

 

“Well um… yes,” Will stuttered yanking the power cord from the laptop making it shut off, “Tell him I say yes.”

 

“Very well,” The nurse smiled heading off towards the door again, “Oh and Mr. Hartmann?”

 

“Yes?”

 

“Sunnydale just got Skype if you were trying to video chat with your family.”

 

“Well I wasn’t,” Will snapped turning red, “Good day to you Nurse.”

 

“Good day Mr. Hartmann.” The nurse smiled shutting the door softly behind her.


	3. Chapter 3

“You came.” Tomas smiled faintly.

 

“Glad to come.” Will smiled back sheepishly. 

 

The dining area of the retirement home was mostly empty at this hour except for a few stray people sitting scattered around the room. The room had a nice soft homely feel to it with heavy drapes and candles lighting the dimly light room. A warm fire roared in the stone fireplace off in the corner shrouding the room in a glow that was almost romantic. It was by no means fancy, and Tomas sat at the table in a pair of simply pants and a flannel t-shirt, but it had a nice feel to it that made Will’s heart quicken. The same tattered book holding Bill and Tom’s story caught Will’s eyes and he found himself wishing that Tomas would read it to him again.

 

“The point of me inviting you to dinner was for you to sit and eat.” Tomas chuckled gesturing to where Will still stood awkwardly by the table.

 

“What?” Will blinked turning red, “Oh of course. My mind wanders sometimes.”

 

“Yeah?” Tomas asked going back to picking at his meal, “I know.” 

 

“Pardon?” Will asked taken off guard. The last part of Tomas’ sentence had barely come out above a whisper but Will had always had good ears and heard it clear as day.

 

“Idaho,” Tomas smiled looking up from his plate to meet Will’s crinkled brow, “These potatoes are from Idaho.”

 

“Oh well I suppose,” Will shifted awkwardly in the chair suddenly uncertain why exactly Tomas had called him down for dinner, “Have you been?”

 

“To Idaho?” Tomas said quietly looking down at his food again, “Yeah one time for a concert.”

 

“A concert? What band?” Will asked desperate for the situation to turn normal again. Everything about the dinner so far had been awkward and cramped leaving Will fidgeting in his chair uneasily. He could feel Tomas’ shoe just barely grazing the hem of his pants as he jigged his foot nervously, of what Will was unsure.

 

“I don’t know if you would have heard of them… Tokio Hotel.”

 

_“And the winner is… TOKIO HOTEL!”_

_Immediately cheers and screams erupted practically shattering his hearing. Balloons were flying everywhere as confetti rained down and making the scene look as if it were from a fairytale._

_“What?” Bill whispered his eyes the size of saucers. He felt Georg tackle him into a hug from the side and he brushed him off quickly practically leaping into Tom’s waiting arms._

_“We won,” Bill whispered hotly into his twin’s ear. The room was loud with cheering but Tom heard him fine, “Oh my god Tomi we won. We did it.”_

_“You did it Bill,” Tom whispered back hugging him tightly, “It was all you.”_

 

“Will?” 

 

“What?” Will jumped looking up startled. His mind was racing he knew that Tom character not from Tomas’ stories but from his own memories. Suddenly it all fit and the small blond haired boy from Tomas’ picture book turned into the full grown dreadlocked haired man that Will had been having visions of lately. A cough interrupted him from his thoughts again and Will looked up confused.

 

Tomas was glancing at him with a worried expression and was sitting forward in his chair almost as if he were going to reach out to him. Will blinked a few times and slowly looked around the room as his mind refocused. He suddenly felt very uneasy and shook his head slightly not sure where that memory had come from. Surely he had seen it in a movie once? Or perhaps on television? But it felt so real almost as if he were there.

 

“Are you okay?” Tomas asked reaching out across the table and taking Will’s in his out of concern. Will stiffened at the contact and looked down to where the two were holding hands and then back up to Tomas. He blushed immediately and released Will’s hand, “You wee just staring off into space.”

 

“Yeah,” Will laughed trying to brush off the fact that Tomas and him had practically been holding hands a moment ago, “I just spaced you know. I hate getting old.”

 

Tomas threw his head back in laugh banging a fist on the table. A few people in the room turned to look at the pair but Will found himself smiling too watching amused as Tomas wiped invisible tears from his eyes.

 

“So,” Tomas smiled after calming down, “You have heard of them then? Tokio Hotel?”

 

“Yes I think I remember seeing them briefly on television one time or another but not too much.” Will shrugged not admitting he had been having visions of the older twin for a while now.

 

“Only briefly?” Tomas asked still smiling but something about his voice let Will know he was disappointed, “They’re my favorite band.” He finished softly looking off to the right.

 

“I’ve always liked Metallica myself,” Will shrugged taking a sip of water. 

 

“Ever hear of Nena?” Tomas asked frowning upon hearing Will’s music choice.

 

“Nena?” Will asked wrinkling his nose, “No I don’t think so. Is that another boy band?”

 

“No it’s a female singer!” Tomas snapped suddenly. Will’s eyes widen at Tomas’ outburst and the latter smoothed his hands down his thighs sighing, “Sorry I just… really liked her as well.”

 

“Understandable.” Will said softly gazing at the storybook again, “Would you read me another chapter?”

 

“Huh?”

 

“Another chapter,” Will blushed nodding towards the book not wanting to have to repeat himself, “I’d like to hear what happened next. I think we left off just after Bill and Tom’s first gig or something. There was crying if I recall.”

 

Tomas chuckled and flipped open the book sliding his chair closer until Will and him sat side by side at the table. Will could feel Tomas’ sleeve brush his arm and he bit his lip unsure why his stomach had suddenly started to turn. Tomas carefully lifted each page that had wrinkled with time until he came to a picture of the two twins. They had grown up quite a lot since the last picture and Bill now had longer hair that hung loose around his face. His brother Tom’s hair was now styled into dreadlocks as small black rubber bands held the pieces of hair in place starting the process. The slightest glimpses of a lip ring on Tom and an eye ring of Bill could be seen and Will’s eyes widened. The pair had their arms slung around each other necks like old pals and were smiling starry eyed up at the camera in what appeared to be another stage of a bar.

 

“Cute.” Will commented tracing the picture’s edge with a bony finger.

 

“Y-yeah.” Tomas’ breath hitched as he stared down at the picture in a mixture of admiration and sadness.

 

_“I’m beat.” The younger twined whined approaching his twin from behind. Letting out a dramatic sigh he fling himself against his brother and leaned heavily into his figure._

_“Ah Bill!” Tom whined struggling to support the sudden weight, “Why do you always hang off of me?”_

_“I’m tired Tomi,” Bill sighed wrapping his arms around his brother’s neck. He was still sweaty from performing that night and Tom grunted when he felt his brother’s sweat through is shirt._

_“Ew Bill!” Tom protested shoving Bill off of him, “You sink like shit! I don’t want you sweating all over me!”_

_“Like you smell any better.” Bill snorted crossing his arms over his chest._

_“At least I don’t stink and have bad hair.” Tom teased easing his guitar back into its case. It was his first real guitar and Gordon, their mother’s new boyfriend, had bought it for him._

_“You’re one to talk with snakes coming out of your head?” Bill laughed tugging on a small curl lightly._

_“Stinky.” Tom smiled wrinkling his nose._

_“Smelly!” Bill shot back sticking out his tongue._

_“Hey.” A voice made the twin’s jump. They looked up to see a short plump blonde boy with glasses standing next to a short brunette with a square jaw._

_“Um hi?” Tom answered uncertainly. He subconsciously moved closer to Bill forming a blockade between his little brother and the two boys still uncertain about their intentions._

_“I’m Gustav.” The blonde smiled._

_“And I’m Patrick.” The brunette smiled extending a hand to Tom. The elder twin eyed it warily before reaching out and shaking the boy’s hand firmly._

_“I’m Tom and this is Bill.” Tom said jerking thumb over his shoulder to where he had hidden Bill. Bill frowned and tried to walk around Tom to get a better look at the boys but suddenly stretched his arm blocking Bill’s path._

_“You guys were pretty good up there.” Gustav smiled nodding towards the stage._

_“How old are you?” Patrick asked bluntly ignoring Gustav’s warning glare._

_“Well um… I’m twelve and so Bill’s but he’s ten minutes younger.” Tom informed smiling when Bill whined and smacked him on the arm._

_“Cool,” Patrick nodded approvingly, “I’m thirteen and so is Gustav. We go to the same music school in down town Magdeburg and were wondering if you two were interested in joining our band.”_

_“Really?” Bill asked excitedly, “That’s so cool!”_

_“What do mean join your band?” Tom frowned grabbing Bill’s forearm tightly._

_“Tomi don’t be rude.” Bill whispered under his breath._

_“Well see Gustav plays drums and I play bass but we need a guitarist and singer.” Patrick shrugged, “We thought you two would be interested in joining our band.”_

_“We already have a band it’s called the Black Question Mark.” Tom informed glaring at the smirking brunette, “Why should we join your band? You should be asking us to join our band.”_

_“Tom.” Bill warned._

_“Join your band? News flash kid,” Tom frowned and gripped Bill’s arm tighter, “If you haven’t noticed bassists are pretty hard to come by and drummers? They’re near impossible to get. Everyone plays the guitar and sings but you can’t have a band with only two people. You need us.”_

_“Oh yeah?” Tom asked angrily, “Well from the looks of it you need us! Why else would you be asking us to join your band huh?”_

_“Quite frankly we’ve had plenty of choices you two are actually on the bottom of our list,” Patrick spat back._

_“Patrick.” Gustav frowned jabbing his friend in the rib disapprovingly._

_“Bullshit you need us!” Tom laughed._

_“Tom!” Bill warned tugging on his brother’s sleeve._

_The dread head stood up straight erecting him self to full height and took a step forwards towards the brunette. The brunette took the challenge and stepped up to Tom as well until the two were only millimeters apart glaring at each other. Gustav and Bill watched helplessly from the side watching as their two friends stared the other down. Bill caught Gustav’s glance and he rolled his eyes in the direction of Tom and Patrick. Gustav snickered and motioned towards the two shaking his head. Meanwhile Tom and Patrick were oblivious to the silent conversation going on next to them until Bill burst into laughter. Gustav soon laughed too and the two were a giggling fit wheezing when Patrick and Tom turned to them questioningly._

_“W-why don we j-just make a new band?” Bill wheezed still giggling._

_“Oh god it’s like you two are in some cheesy Western!” Gustav laughed letting out a snort. Gustav froze and put a hand over his mouth in embarrassment but this only made Bill laugh even harder and the two were at it again hanging off the other._

_“You talking to me?” Bill cackled deepening his voice. Gustav shook his head frantically no._

_“I said are you talking to me?” Bill giggled when Gustav shook his head no, “Well then who are you talking to?”_

_“I surrender!” Gustav laughed throwing both arms up in the air._

_“B-Bill!” Tom stuttered watching as his brother and the blonde laughed like mad men._

_“Gustav cut it out!” Patrick snapped._

_“Oh god. Oh god.” Bill gasped for breath._

_“Jeez.” Gustav laughed wiping his eyes. The two turned to each other and smiled brightly realizing that the other wasn’t so bad._

_“What the fuck man?” Patrick asked shaking his head smiling. He paused for a moment before snickering, which soon after turned into full out laughing. The laugh set Gustav off again and he shoved Bill playfully laughing himself silly. Bill joined into soon after making his way towards Tom and throwing his arms around his waist._

_“C-come on Tomi,” Bill giggled poking his twin in the cheek, “Smile.” Tom merely grunted and continued to glare over where Gustav and Patirck were laughing._

_“You know,” Patrick laughed settling down, “You’re not too bad Bill.”_

_“Neither are you.” Bill beamed._

_“How did the two of you even start fighting?” Gustav asked. Patrick shrugged and Gustav laughed slugging him in the arm._

_“I think we got off on the wrong foot,” Gustav smiled stepping towards Bill with an extended hand, “Hi I’m Gustav.”_

_“Bill. Tom.” Bill nodded shaking Gustav’s hand smiling._

_“Would you two be interested in making a new band with us?” Gustav asked, “It won’t be your band. It won’t be Patrick and mine’s band, it will be our new band.”_

_“That sounds wonderful.” Bill smiled._

_“W-what?” Tom sputtered turning to his brother in disbelief, “Bill!”_

_“Great!” Gustav smiled, “Well it’s getting late how about we meet again tomorrow after school. We get out at four. You guys?”_

_“Same.” Bill nodded ignoring how Tom was glaring at him._

_“So tomorrow same place after school?”_

_“Sure!”_

_“Great see you guys tomorrow.”_

_“See ya Gustav.”_

 

“Hmm that Patrick sounds like an ass,” Will yawned leaning his head on his propped up hand.

 

“Yeah he is.” Tomas grunted shutting the book. Will eyebrows rose up and Tomas stopped, “Well I mean he was you know in the story.”

 

“Yeah.” Will yawned again taking one last sip of his drink. He looked around to find another nurse but the dining room was empty as the fire had been reduced to a few soft glowing embers, “My god it’s ten o-clock already? Where did the time go?”

 

“Yeah sorry about keeping you up so late.” Tomas apologized getting up from out of the chair. Will extended a hand to him and he helped hoist the other man up. 

 

“I don’t mind,” Will smiled brushing off his shirt, “I like this story Mr. Kaulitz I really do.”

 

“It’s a good story.” Tomas shrugged yawning, “We’re not even half way done yet too.”

 

“Thank you.” Will said after a moment.

 

“For what?” Tomas asked confused.

 

“I don’t really have much friends here and I know I’m a lot to put up with. I just wanted to thank you for being my friend so far is all.” Will shrugged scratching his arm nervously. 

 

“Well thank you for taking the time to listen.” Tomas smiled picking up the storybook and motioning for them to leave.

 

“Will you read me another chapter tomorrow?” Will asked hopefully.

 

“I’ll read you two or three if you can get down to the pond by one.” Tomas smiled.

 

“Deal,” Will nodded heading off down the right of the hall where his room was, “Goodnight Tomas.”

 

“Goodnight Will,” Tomas called over his shoulder as he walked down the left of the hall to his room. He listened quietly until Will’s shuffling footsteps retreated and he gazed out the window at the full moon.

 

“Goodnight.”


	4. Chapter 4

Will smiled at himself in the mirror, actually genuinely smiled for the first time in many years. He could not describe to overwhelming feeling that always seemed to arise in his stomach when in the company of Mr. Kaulitz but something about that man made his toes curl.

 

He had woken up that morning before anyone else in Sunnydale Retirement Home For The Elderly had and practically jumped out of bed in excitement to get dressed and go see Tomas. Unfortunately he’d woken up just a little too early he discovered when the hallways were empty of any residents and even nurses. It had only been five thirty then and Will had spent most of the morning walking around in the gardens outside trying to pass the time. The morning air was cool outside, not unbearably cold, but unsettling however Will’s body felt warm and giddy. He had looked healthier in his mind he thought when catching a glimpse of himself in the windows and his hazel eyes were dancing in anticipation. He normally didn’t take well to new people on account of that he was bossy and often demanding never being able to find someone that could keep up with him even in old age. Even his wife Sydney didn’t understand him at times and it seemed even after being married for fifty-nine years they just didn’t seemed to be on the same page. 

 

Tomas however was different, Will couldn’t place why but he had the strangest feeling that he already knew Tomas somehow. It just seemed the moment they met something had clicked tearing down the walls Will had spent years forming that blocked out the outside world. With one simple smile from the man Will had been disarmed and left defenseless but the best part was he’d never felt more alive in years.

 

“Mr. Hartmann is that you?” The sound of the nurse’s voice caught Will’s attention. 

 

He turned to her suddenly confused on why he was standing outside, let alone in his bare feet, staring at the oak trees. As the nurse walked over to him already scolding him from her distance Will felt his heart unconsciously sink as his happy mood was killed.

 

“Mr. Hartmann you scared the daylights out of me,” The nurse chuckled placing a hand softly on the old man’s shoulder. Will tensed at the touch and watched as her breath became visible as it hit the air. When had it become so cold? 

 

“I was looking for you all morning,” She continued still smiling, “Imagine my reaction when I walk in to wake you up this morning and your bed is empty and cold! Goodness you gave the staff quite a fright!”

 

“My apologies,” Will whispered quietly not meeting her gaze. Her demeanor was nice and inviting but Will couldn’t help but feel like a child getting scolded by a teacher.

 

“You’re forgiven just don’t go running off like that again you hear? Come on Mr. Hartmann let’s get you inside,” The nurse smiled taking him by the elbow and steering him towards the home, “You must be freezing without any shoes on, my.”

 

“W-wait… wait,” Will frowned halting for a moment, “I was… I was supposed to met someone here… but I don’t… I don’t remember who or why.”

 

“Meeting someone? Oh! I forgot to tell you Mr. Kaulitz will not be able to make your acquaintance this afternoon something came up with his family so he’s visiting them I’m sure you’ll understand,” The nurse said still smiling but now one of sympathy, “He told me to give you this and ‘only listen until chapter four’ whatever that means. That doesn’t have any significance to you does it?”

 

“Oh,” Will stated quietly trying to recover from the shock. That’s right he was meeting Tomas so he could read him more of the story. Brief sadness overtook him for a moment and Will frowned looking down at his feet feeling embarrassed for being so excited earlier. He was just lucky that Tomas had to leave and not see his embarrassment. Tomas. Leave.

 

“He left me a book?” Will asked startled looking up quickly. He caught the nurse off guard and she jumped slightly before nodding puzzled, “Where is it? Do you have it on you?”

 

“N-no I left it in your room. He left you a voice recorder and a scrapbook. We can go get it if you want-”

 

“I’ll meet you inside Lucy!” Will cried out happily hobbling towards the house as fast as his legs would carry him.

 

“It’s Nurse Lucy, Mr. Hartmann! Mr. Hartmann slow down you’ll hurt yourself!” She called after him watching as the old man pushed the screen door open hastily.

 

“No time gotta run!” She faintly heard him call over his shoulder before disappearing from view.

 

“Old people.” She smiled shaking her head.

* * *

_“I don’t see why we have to do this.” Tom huffed crossing his arms over his chest._

_They were up in Tom’s room again. Simone and Jorg had moved Bill out of Tom’s room a few months ago but Bill still ended up spending more time in Tom’s room anyway, it just felt natural._

_“Oh come on Tomi it’ll be fun,” Bill pleaded latching on to his brother’s arm, “Please? For me?”_

_Tom made an indignant noise and Bill scowled picking up a pillow and batting him with it, “Tomi come on!”_

_“What was wrong with our band before?” Tom asked sounded wounded. Bill blinked and looked up to met his brother’s hurt eyes, “I thought it was fine just you… and me. We work.”_

_“Of course we do but think about how much better we’ll be. Patrick is right Tom, we need more than two people in a band,” Bill smiled encouragingly, “Give it a chance.”_

_“Patrick?” Tom spat upon hearing the brunette’s name, “Since when do you care what Patrick says?”_

_“Tom don’t start this.” Bill groaned flopping back onto his twin’s bed. The sheets smelled of cologne and Tom making Bill smile as he inhaled their scent._

_“No I want to talk about this,” Tom snapped. Bill felt the mattress sag next to him and he groaned trying to turn away when Tom’s hands grabbed his hips, “You keep talking about him non-stop… it’s like… it’s like your in love with him or something!”_

_“What?” Bill squawked pushing Tom’s hands away sitting up quickly, “Ew no! Tomi that’s gross! I’m not in love with him and I do not talk about him non-stop.”_

_“Yes you do!” Tom shot back grabbing the bed spread in his tiny fist, “I… I don’t like it Bill. There’s something about him that I just don’t like and when you talk about him all the time at home… just stop.”_

_“You’re such a baby! Seriously Tom I do not talk about him all the time.” Bill frowned crossing his hands over his chest and sticking his nose up in the air, “I don’t know where you come up with these things. I haven’t talked about him once since we’ve been home.”_

_“Yeah in front of my face.” Tom frowned. Bill’s eyes flew open at this and he sputtered for a moment eyeing Tom suspiciously._

_“I-I don’t know what you mean.” Bill said playing coy. His cheeks were burning red and Tom smiled instantly knowing his twin was lying._

_“Bill don’t lie come on.”_

_“I’m not.”_

_“Bill.”_

_“No.”_

_“I know you’re lying.” Tom smirked._

_“How?”_

_“Well first off your face is redder than a tomato,” Tom grinned when Bill’s eyes went wide in shock and his face burned even darker, “And second of all I heard you on the phone with Andreas last night.”_

_“We were not!” Bill squeaked flushing when his voice became high pitched._

_“Really? So you weren’t talking on the phone talking about how ‘cool’ Patrick was? Or how you know an ‘older’ boy? Huh?” Tom sneered jabbing his twin’s arm lightly._

_“Dick.” Bill snapped rubbing at where Tom had poked him, “Andreas and I were just talking and who are you to eavesdrop on our conversation?”_

_“You should have heard yourself,” Tom glared suddenly becoming angry as he moved closer to Bill on the bed, “You were acting like you were so proud that you knew him. You made it seem like you guys were best friends.”_

_Bill’s ears burned bright red and he glared back at Tom refusing to back down as Tom scooted closer. He opened his mouth to refute Tom’s statement but Tom beat him to it._

_“Do you really like him that much?” Tom growled angrily. Bill made a small noise and looked away hiding his face from his twin and Tom’s heart skipped a beat, “Bill?”_

_“Go away!” Bill snapped his eyes watering, “Like you’d know how my mind works! We may be twins Tom but sometimes you’re so dense! Why can’t you just let them join the band? Grow up!”_

_“Bill!” Tom pleaded when the younger brother got up off the bed and walked towards the door, “Bill!”_

_“No!”_

_“No wait!” Tom begged getting up off the bed and catching his twin by the arm. The room was silent except for Simone’s singing downstairs and suddenly the air shifted, “Bill, is it really that big of a deal to you to be popular?” His voice was softer now, quietly begging his twin to let him know what was going on in his head._

_“I just…” Bill whimpered still not facing Tom. Tom watched as his body shuddered and suddenly Bill broke into sobs flinging his arms around Tom’s neck and tackling them onto the bed, “I just want to be accepted! Y-you have n-no idea what it’s like!”_

_“W-what? Bill? Billa!” Tom gasped as Bill sobbed loudly into Tom’s neck clinging to him for dear life. Bill’s entire frame was quivering from his sobs and Tom lay pinned on his back in shock running a soothing hand over his brother’s back in means to calm him._

_“Y-you wouldn’t g-get it.” Bill cried gripping Tom’s shirt so tightly that he stretched out the material._

_“What do you mean?” Tom whispered afraid to say the wrong thing._

_“You’re… y-you’re popular.” Bill sniffed looking up at Tom with a sad smile, “People like you, they don’t like me.”_

_“What are you-”_

_“Ever since you got new friends you’ve stopped hanging out with me and I only have Andreas now but sometimes he’s not even at school! I just… I just want to them to like me the way they like you,” Bill sobbed into Tom’s chest hiding his face ashamed, “People like you, you’re cool. I want that too. We’re twins why aren’t I like that? Tomi tell me why!”_

_“Shh, shh, Bill,” Tom panicked wrapping his arms around his twin and pulling them up to sit, “Why didn’t you tell me this earlier? I thought you wanted to make new friends you said you did.”_

_“Yeah but I wanted to make with you! Not for you to go off and make them without me!” Bill cried brokenly sobbing all over again._

_“…I didn’t know.” Tom said after a moment looking down at where their legs were tangles together. He could feel Bill’s heart beating wildly in his chest and Tom sighed in frustration._

_“Of course you didn’t know!” Bill snapped roughly shoving Tom away. Tom sat back stunned for a moment before trapping Bill in his arms again refusing to let go when Bill screeched, “You’re too busy playing with your older friends to even know what’s going on in my life! Fuck half your friends are the ones that beat me up at school!”_

_“Will you shut up?” Tom shouted angrily grabbing Bill by his shoulders and throwing him onto the bed, “Just shut up Bill! You wonder why the kids at school don’t like you, have you seen yourself lately? God you’re so… you’re so… you’re so embarrassing at times!”_

_“I’m embarrassing at times? I’m embarrassing at times?” Bill screeched trying to sit up. Tom panicked for a moment and threw himself down on the bed trying to silence Bill in fear of Mom coming upstairs, “Get off of me pervert!”_

_“Don’t call me that!” Tom screamed, “You don’t even know what that means!”_

_“Yeah well I heard the older kids at school call you that when you checked out our teacher’s butt!” Bill shouted back trying to buck Tom off again, “Get off of me!”_

_“Shut up Bill! God do want Mom to hear?” Tom hissed covering Bill’s mouth with his hand. Bill’s tongue snaked out of his mouth and he licked Tom’s hand before promptly biting down hard, “Fuck!”_

_“Mom told you not to swear!” Bill snapped struggling under Tom’s weight._

_“B-Bill…” Tom trailed off as Bill’s thigh brushed against his crotch. Suddenly Tom’s body felt flushed and he swallowed not understanding what was happening._

_“Get off of me!” Bill hissed quieter this time, “Or I’ll go tell Mom that it was you that broke the vase last week!”_

_“Bill.” Tom warned struggling to keep his twin pinned beneath him. Bill bucked his hips into Tom’s and the older twin quietly moaned before Bill brought a knee up slamming him in the back, “Ouch! Bill!”_

_“I will! I swear I will!” Bill taunted staring Tom down with gleaming eyes, “And then I’ll tell her that you looked at that magazine with the older boys in the bathroom at school!”_

_“Shut up!” Tom cried shoving a pillow over Bill’s face. The younger twin squealed and kicked his leg out to the side slamming Tom hard in the ribs. Tom gasped from the blow and lightened his grip on the pillow giving Bill the opportunity to sit up and topple him over backwards._

_“I don’t get why you hang out with them!” Bill snarled as tears began to stream out of his eyes again, “They’re not even nice! Tomi they’re mean to me why are you friends with them?”_

_“Because they’re cool!” Tom protested dodging a pillow that Bill had picked up as he began throwing them at Tom. When Tom’s bed ran out of pillows he grabbed some socks and chucked them at Tom, “At least I have friends!”_

_“And whose fault is that?” Bill snarled, “You left me that day on the playground! Tomi that wasn’t fair!”_

_“I didn’t do anything!” Tom pleaded picking up a fallen sock and throwing it at Bill. It hit his twin square in the chest and Bill made a whooshing noise before hunching over. Tom stopped for a moment when he saw that Bill had started to cry again and he walked over carefully, mixed emotions swimming in his mind and groin, “Billa… I’m sorry.”_

_“Go away.” Bill hissed quietly rubbing at his eyes. Tom frowned and stepped closer trying to catch a glimpse of his twin’s crying face._

_“Bill?” Tom asked wrapping his arms around his twin. Bill tensed in his hold._

_“MOM!” Bill shrieked, “MOMMY! MOMMY HELP! TOM’S HURTING ME!”_

_“W-what?” Tom pulled back in disbelief at the sound of their mother’s footsteps pounding up the stairs, “Bill!”_

_“Serves you right.” Bill snarled just as the bedroom door flew open._

_“Tom Kaulitz! Get off your brother this instant! You know I will not allow roughhousing in the house!” Simone ordered walking across the room and grabbing Tom by the arm, “I can’t leave you two alone for one minute lately can I? Tom’s what’s gotten into you lately?”_

_“Mom!” Tom whined as Simone dragged him out the door, “I didn’t do anything! Bill’s being a baby! This is my room tell Bill to leave! It’s Bill’s fault I didn’t do anything!”_

_“I’ve heard enough young man. First the fight at school and now this?” Simone sighed shaking her head letting go of Tom’s arm._

_“I wasn’t doing anything!” Tom protested stamping his foot on the ground._

_“Tom enough or you’ll be grounded.” Simone warned before turning to where Bill still sat motionless on the bed, “Bill, honey, are you alright? Tom didn’t scuff you up too badly did he?”_

_“It wasn’t my fault!” Tom screamed pushing past Simone making his way out the door, “I hate you people! Nobody loves me!”_

_“Tom!” Simone called after her son as he stomped down the stairs, “Tom! Come back here! Tom!”_

_“Tomi wait!”_

_“Tom!”_

* * *

Will clicked off the voice recorder and the sound of Tomas’ voice stopped. Will frowned for a moment having vivid memories of screaming in an unfamiliar house at another boy but the memory was blurred and Will couldn’t make out the boy’s face. All he could remember was the feeling of being hurt deeply and wanting revenge on the person that had inflicted it on him. His eyes felt heavy from Tomas’ storytelling and he smiled getting comfortable.

 

“Strange,” Will yawned leaning back against the oak tree Tomas and him normally sat at, “This story seems so familiar somehow.”

 

_“Bill you don’t look so good,” A voice cooed warmly, “Are you alright?”_

 

“Yes I’m fine.” Will whispered coughing a little, “Just taking a break is all.”

 

_“Bill come on it’s not even nine yet!”_

 

“I’m…. sleepy.” Will yawned again as his eyelids grew heavy, “Just a short nap… that’s all.”

 

_“Bill catch me! Come on!”_

 

“You go ahead I’ll catch up…. With… you.” Will muttered closing his eyes.

 

_“Bill? What do ya think of this new cap? Picked it up in America pretty sweet huh?_

 

“ ‘s fine.” Will barely managed to whispered before letting out a loud snore. Old age had won again as he drifted off into a deep sleep.

* * *

_Bill and Tom didn’t talk through dinner refusing to even look at each other. The air around the dinner table was tense and the twins remained silent as Jorg and Simone continued to talk on about Jorg’s day at work._

_It was no secret that Jorg never married Simone even after Bill and Tom were born. One moment Simone and Jorg had been two crazy teenagers in love and the next thing they knew Simone was pregnant. She’d never brought up the topic of marriage with Jorg and so he never asked. It had hurt Simone greatly to know that even when she was carrying Jorg’s children that he didn’t love her enough to marry her but she kept quiet, thankful that he had decided to stick around for the time being. They were a broken family and the twins knew that even if their parents never liked to talk about it. The town of Leipzig wasn’t too small, but just small enough for everyone to know about the Kaulitz’s family troubles. The women that always hung out by the shops during the day, the ones at the supermarket, or the ones that lived down the street would always stare after Simone when she walked by, their eyes alight with knowing smiles. Although no one ever approached Simone about it was obvious that they did not accept her. Not once since she had the twins had someone stopped by to say hello to her, even common courtesies such as holding the door open seemed to vanish. Simone felt out of place, a black sheep standing out among the flock, and Bill and Tom took the heat for it as well. The very children of the women that Simone used to call friends teased the twins at school, calling them names that Bill and Tom’s innocent childish minds could not even comprehend as their classmates recited what they had overheard their parents saying._

_The tension in the air hung over the Kaulitz family’s head that night as they tried to make it through dinner without Jorg snapping at Simone again. Too bad it seemed fortune never really favored twins._

_“It really wasn’t that big of a deal you know.” Jorg shrugged stuffing more food into his mouth. Bill watched his father wearily from his spot at the table cringing when Jorg shoveled another mouthful in even when he still had food in his mouth._

_“That’s wonderful darling.” Simone smiled picking at the green beans on her plate._

_“Yeah,” Jorg mumbled though his food, “How was your day?”_

_“Well,” Simone hesitated, “I dropped the boys off at school and then went grocery store.”_

_And silence hung over the table and Jorg’s face darkened. The family remained silent for a moment before Simone took a deep breath and continued not noticing how her husband was glaring down at his plate._

_“And I saw Mrs. Schwartz,” Simone smiled sadly, “I haven’t seen her since before… before…”_

_Simone trailed off and cleared her throat staring down at her plate again. The tension still hung in the air and Bill squirmed biting his lip out of nervousness._

_“Tom, honey, could you pass the mashed potatoes?” Simone asked breaking the silence._

_Tom grunted in response and handed over the plate avoiding Bill’s pleading eyes from across the table, “Here.”_

_“Thank you.” Simone smiled weakly._

_“Whatever.” Tom grumbled. A loud clang echoed throughout the room making Tom jump. Immediately everyone’s eyes went to the end of the table where Jorg sat._

_“What did you say to your mother?” Jorg demanded banging his fist on the table. The glasses rattled under the force and Bill squeaked earning a glare from his father._

_“Jorg come on now,” Simone, said in shaking voice, “He didn’t mean-”_

_“Didn’t mean for what?” Jorg demanded glaring at Tom with dark eyes, “You never speak to your mother that way again young man!”_

_“Dad I-”_

_“Don’t talk back to me!” Jorg shouted scooting out of his chair. The chair legs dragged against the hardwood floors loudly and Tom panicked jumping out of his seat attempting to make a dash for the stairs._

_“Don’t you run away from me!” Jorg shouted grabbing Tom by the arm and hauling him backwards, “How dare you speak to your mother that way boy!”_

_“Jorg he didn’t mean to!” Simone pleaded rushing to her husband’s side, “Jorg stop!”_

_“Let go of me!” Tom howled thrashing wildly. When his hand flung out and hit Jorg square across the face Tom stilled staring up at his father with fearful eyes._

_“You insolent little piece of shit!” Jorg thundered smacking Tom across the face. Tom cried out in pain and Bill shrieked in terror beginning to sob, “Don’t you ever try to run away from me again! How dare you talk to your mother that way! Do you hear me?”_

_“Let me go! Let me go!” Tom cried struggling against his father’s grip._

_“Listen to me when I’m talking to you!” Jorg shouted twisting Tom’s arm back. The young boy cried out in pain and Simone screamed for Jog to stop._

_“Jorg stop it! You’re hurting him!” Simone pleaded grabbing Jorg’s other arm and tugging on it, “Jorg stop it now! He didn’t mean to! Jorg!”_

_“Daddy stop!” Bill cried rushing out from his chair over to where his other three family members were tangled by the staircase, “Leave Tomi alone!”_

_“Let go of me!” Tom shouted kicking his father in the shin. Jorg hissed and released Tom’s arm clutching his shin in pain. Tom froze on the spot staring down at his father amazed that he was able to make the yelling stop. A feeling of power rushed through him in that moment and Tom did the most foolish thing ever, he hit his father over the head._

_“Jorg!” Simone cried out when he fell to the floor stunned._

_“Tomi!” Bill sobbed throwing his arms around his twin’s waist._

_“Uh,” Jorg groaned from his spot on the floor, “You little…. You… I’m going to fucking kill you!”_

_Jorg stumbled to his feet and it was then that Tom truly feared his father. Jorg’s eyes were black with anger as he loomed over Tom and he had a slightly deranged look to him and he advanced on the twins. Simone screamed that she was calling the police and Jorg lashed out hitting Simone across the face. She fell to the floor in an unmoving pile and Bill screamed out hugging onto Tom for dear life._

_“You hit Mom!” Tom shouted angrily at his father._

_“You hit Mom! I’ll fucking kill you!” Tom screamed before shoving Bill off of him and rushing at his father. Jorg’s hand shot out and Tom fell to the ground stunned as his face slowly began to sting. Tom screamed in anger and launched himself at his father aiming for his throat. Jorg made gasping noises as Tom’s tiny hands clamped around his throat while Bill screamed in terror in the background only adding to the situation._

_“Get…off of me!” Jorg shouted throwing Tom to the floor again. Tom hissed in anger and kicked at his father’s feet before Jorg picked him up by his shirt collar listing him off the ground._

_“You little shit! I may have brought you into this world but don’t think that I won’t take you out of it just as fast!” Jorg shouted in Tom’s face._

_“Bastard!” Tom screamed kicking at his father, “You fucking bastard!”_

_“Why you-” Jorg snarled._

_“Let Tomi go!” Bill sobbed jumping on Jorg’s back, “Let Tomi go!”_

_“No Bill, don’t!” Tom warned but it was too late Jorg had thrown his twin against their living room wall. Bill’s head hit the wall with a thud and Tom watched in horror as his younger half slid down against it before tumbling over unmoving._

_“You’re a monster!” Tom screamed in anger. He poked Jorg roughly in the eye and Jorg dropped him to the floor._

_“Fuck!” Jorg screamed as Tom made a dash for the telephone. He picked it up quickly dialing the police, his heart racing, as he heard Jorg lumbering into the room after him._

_“What do you think you’re doing boy?” Jorg demanded blinking rapidly.  
“Come on, come on,” Tom prayed as the phone rang._

_“Hello Leipzig Police Department please state your emergency.” A voice on the phone said._

_“My name’s Tom Kaulitz I live at-”_

_“No you don’t.” Jorg shouted snatching the phone away and flinging it across the room._

_“HELP ME!” Tom screamed as his father punched him in stomach, “HELP ME! PLEASE HELP!”_

_“You tricky little fucker! How dare you?” Jorg screamed raising his hand. Tom gulped and watched as his father’s hand came down._

_Everything was black after that._


End file.
